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Sugar Rushes Suck!

 I have a migraine and it sucks. Woke up this morning glad I don't have school on Mondays because I would be in a fouler mood than how I already am. School started again and its going alright except a bunch of my classes are boring as hell and my Blackberry ends up dying on me before noon every day. Its getting stressful but I like it like that, gives me purpose. I love rushing to do things so I guess journalism is going to be the perfect career for me so I'll feel right at home. 

Went to a giving thanks party last night...its a long story...and I had so many sweets that  I woke up with a sugar hangover and I have a paper to write for Journalism 1000...that is due tomorrow so I am not very happy right now. 

Still hate everyone and everything (lol...very Zuko of me) and all I want to do is sleep for like a week straight but alas, I can't. I have to go to school and be productive....sucks. Becoming legal is annoying...I still wish I was a minor in high school and all I had to worry about was what I was going to wear the next day....not have to worry about how I'm going to pay off my school debts. Oh well, I guess I didn't read the fine print when I turned 18. 


The HPV shot sucks but at least I'll be o-n-e l-e-s-s. (lol)  

School Is Finally Over!!

 Its a day looked forward by everyone who goes to school (parents dread it though...). School is finally over for the summer.

I handed in my last final last night (since it was a take-home) and am very happy and excited to get through the release of my grades without having to resort to bartering with God...I apparently could pull miracles on my own (lol...I hope this isn't blasphemy). I got my grades for 3 classes I was taking and so far I've gotten an A, an A-, and a B. I was the most surprised for the A- since I could've sworn I did horribly on the final but I guess I didn't and the A was also shocking because it was a music class that I had to go to a concert for. There was a concert on my birthday but I was not about to spend 3 hours of my birthday at school listening to classical music so I didn't go to any concert even though the professor said it was 25 percent of the grade so I am still guessing how I pulled an A in the class. The last class I'm waiting for is philosophy. I HATE philosophy especially Socrates/Plato. Everyone thinks they are the best philosophers in the world, I think they're full of hot air. Like they avoid answering a simple question and use like 10 million different analogies and riddles to say that they have no freaking clue what the answer is...so yeah, maybe its the girl in me that likes getting right to the point (like using a map when you're lost and drive around in circles for HOURS!) but I think philosophy is a waste of time. (Sorry to anyone that does like philosophy). Those classes were just fillers for my next semester so they could boost my GPA up and that is exactly what has been happening and I am very happy about. It is going up and I have nothing to worry about now...no fear of being rejected into a program that I am guessing I didn't really want, not much stress on people's lives, I can finally relax in college (even if it is a little late) and I don't mind that I'm going to be in debt when school is finally said and done, my happiness will be worth it. (hopefully)...

I will be taking summer school though but its an online class so I don't even have to show up to campus to do my work...which is awesome because I hate having to get up for only one class. Next semester is going to be great. I have class only 3 days a week-Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. 4 day weekends every week. I have one 3 hour class on Wednesday and I have class at 7:35 in the morning on Tuesdays and Thursdays but I'm done at 12 every day so no biggie. I guess its for the best since I'm starting a new field and I just want to relax this semester (even if I do have to get up super early...that's what Starbucks is for). 

While I wait for summer school, I am continuing my diet regimen. I am losing weight and very excited because my jeans are fitting me a little big and my shirts as well so I am happy. The only think that is bothering me is my thighs since I guess they're going to be thick even if I lose 100 pound (I don't need to lose that much...I'll weight like 70 pounds if I did) and my chubby cheeks. My mom says I'm stuck with them anyway since I've had them since forever but I guess that's ok. It makes me look younger. (People actually think I'm still a minor even though I just turned 22). I plan on losing 20-25 pounds for a wedding I'm going to in September hopefully I can fulfill that goal and then keep going until I'm at my ideal weight for my height but that can be a littler slower. Maybe I'll even get a boyfriend out of it...hopefully. I'm really comfortable where I am going now, everything is like fitting into place. My hair is growing back (stress really kills my hair) and I'm losing weight. My skin is looking better than ever (thank God) and my nails are finally looking awesome (even if I do paint them like 10 different colors...at the same time). I'm just happy where I am right now. I'm not asking for much but I just want a guy to share it with and I know I'm being a little selfish but that is what next semester is...boys (school will be there too....). 

Enough about boys, I'm in a little tiff with my best friend, P. She's great and she's always there for me but lately, things have stood between us. She's always doing something and if we make plans, something always comes up. (God, I sound like an angry girlfriend). Its annoying like today we made plans to go to Chinatown, just like we did last year. We had planned this weeks ahead and then last night I texted her asking her what time we were meeting up and she said she couldn't go because something came up. I can't go tomorrow because I got a doctor's appointment and Friday she can't go. Its annoying when you can't see your friend outside of school, its like being in a long distance relationship...it sucks! Hopefully next week we could meet up. I haven't seen her in ages because we have different majors and have different schedules so hopefully next semester, we can meet up and hang out at least once a week....hopefully. 

Ok, I'm done for right now I guess...nothing more to say, I'm all drained out. (Just wait until the afternoon, I'll have loads to tell) 

The Joys of Virtual Gardening

'Gardening Mama' is/was my latest addiction...was since I already finished it. Anyway, school is finally over and I study for finals and relax for a few weeks before summer school but no worries...I am very happy and comfortable now. I'm already progressing in my weight loss and am very happy. I finally ended my old career studies and am about to start a new one and once again, I'm happy. Everything is going good and its wonderful....well almost everything. Somethings need to be taken care of but I will cross that bridge when I get to it. 


Ok, so I've been away for like ever but I haven't had much to write about...I started school again last week that month of vacation flew by not that I didn't want to come home. I missed my laptop...my bed...and other electronical goods. I went to a resort/hotel for about a week where I was supposed to get a tan but I didn't get much sun since all I wanted to do was watch 'Wire in the Blood' this really cool English (from England) television show that I became addicted to like on the first episode I watched. So when I had to leave back to my mom's house, I was a little disappointed (ok, a lot disappointed!). Our flight back home had a lot of turbulance which I did not enjoy since I'm terrified of flying. If there were other methods of reaching other countries that didn't take a few days like on a boat, I would take them. I hate flying and I have a dream of going to Europe...I wonder how I'm going to pull that off without having the plane do an emergency landing from me having a heart attack 3 hours in...(I'm such a wuss!!!)

Since school has already started and the first thing that greeted me when I came back was my tuition bill, I had to go take care of that before I could get my program. On the first day, which was a hot as Hades, I had to know all the bones and you're probably wondering if I did since I planned to do so during the summer...yeah...no. I learned them all pretty quickly though since the week I got them assigned. I'm not as dumb as I thought I was...or exhibit any ADD symptoms as I thought I would while I studied.

School sucks...life is boring...its pouring right now thanks to a passing hurricane and I'm tired of naming bones...


Did you ever wonder how the witch from the 'Wizard of Oz' felt when Dorothy threw a bucket of water at her and she began to yell 'I'm melting!'? I think I know EXACTLY how she felt. The last few days have the worst I think that I have EVER dealt with. New York City was in the middle of a heat wave...a REALLY bad one.

It was my misfortune that on Monday, the day that was going to hit 100 degrees was the day that I just had to leave my air conditioned room and go sell my college textbooks and it was the worst...mistake...EVER!!! I left early that day thinking that if I went and got this over with early in the day it wouldn't get that hot and before I could really experience heat, I would on the train to go home already...WRONG!! It wasn't even 10:30 in the morning when my jeans and everything was wet. My sunglasses were sliding off my nose from the sweat and I was carrying 10 pounds of books which slooowed me down some and walking from 14th street and 8th avenue to 18th and 5th is the worst possible thing I could've done. 

To make matters worst, I had to wait for my sis to come out of school so we could walk to 34th street and 7th avenue where the world famous Macy's is which was another horrible idea. Not even Starbucks could cool me down and I had ordered my most favorite thing: a caramel frappaccino and I even got free extra caramel. I was sweating so much that by the time I got home, my jeans had chafed my thighs from walking so much. 

I hate the fucking summer....


Ok, the weirdest and most random thing happened to me...well, actually I dreamt it...I had a Dramione dream...freaky, right? 

I had never dreamt of Harry Potter and even less about Dramione but there I was front row seat to my own Dramione dream and even in my dreams their love was sort of forbidden. 

Apparently it was during the seige of Hogwarts and Hermione had this plan of infiltrating the castle by shrinking down to ant size and using the ants and other bugs to get into the castle undetected. Draco would appear but not say anything. So they infiltrate the castle and its a massive group of them all together trying to get into the castle but when they get inside and get bigger, they end up in this solarium type of room filled with birds and supposedly the most dangerous is this small pink and white bird that Hermione called a magpie who only said its name when a person was around. Since they were all sleeping they didn't notice the room was full of people but when the people got big and began to make a lot of noise the birds woke up including the magpies and they began to say their names and then Hermione started crying and Draco was consoling her because he knew their end was near and the doors slammed open and everyone got killed. Narcissa and Lucius were in the group as well as they got killed and there was sad music playing in the background...like a movie....

I should lay off reading fanfic before bed...


I have been sick for the past 5 days...really, really, REALLY sucks. Its a coughing-sneezing-phlegmy thing that is EXTREMELY annoying. I get better and then I relapse and mostly its my sis's fault. 

We share a room and since its hot here in the city, she feels the need to turn on the air conditioner when I'm coughing up a storm. The first night we didn't turn it on since I felt really bad and I knew it would work a number on me but the second night I didn't last 10 minutes. It felt like I was breathing in the air from the refrigerator and it was totally drying out nose on the inside and it was bothering my throat so I had to get up and turn if off and have my sis mad at me for doing so. The last few days though, I was able to turn it on and not having a coughing or sneezing fit and that's because I was hiding under my duvet so I could breathe in the moist air inside of there or else I was going to choke and that's not cute...

Getting ready to go on vacation...woooo....bought my anatomy study things because even though I'm supposedly on vacation, I need to study the 206 bones of the body as well as all the muscles and veins and arteries so might as well start now...

With friends like these, who needs enemies?

I love gossip, especially if its about people I don't like. I had just woken up and was loading my washing machine with laundry when my father came over to talk to me. Normally, we just went our separate ways in the morning until my mother got home from work because I am not a morning person, but this morning he decided to come over and talk. 

We have a weird relationship just because I'm not my sister who cries at the drop of a hat and tells my parents constantly that she loves them...I can't do that to save my life, well I can, but I just don't mean it. I can't be like my sis and that has always caused some tension in the family, but anyway, he came over to ask me about my cousin, another person I have the weirdest relationship with. 

JR is my cousin, its not Jr...its JR because those are her initials but anyway, she's my cousin who is exactly 9 months older than me. We pretty much grew up together since my mother and her mother are really close since JR's mother is my sis godmother and my uncle is her father so we pretty much grew up together. It was normally me, lisa (my ex-best friend), JR, my sis and JR's brother. We were alwasy hanging out together and it was cool when it was just us. Since Lisa, JR, and me were pretty much the same age, we always hung out together but this is where the relationship turns weird. 

JR and me pretty much based our relationship on the our mothers' relationship. If one of our mother's wasn't speaking to the other, we wouldn't speak to each other but we still hung out together with Lisa who was our common friend. As we got older, we took the no talking thing to an extreme. We all went to the same high school and we had the same friends and everyone would be shocked to find out that JR and me were cousins but we didn't speak a word to each other for months but once our mothers began to speak again, we would begin again and we would talk and talk for hours on the phone and online. As we got older though, our relationships changed.

During my Freshmen year at college, Lisa and me drifted apart mostly because we worked together and that is a HUGE mistake anyone can make. I worked my ass off all the time while she thought she could do whatever she wanted just because she was cool with the manager. She also got into a fight with my sis...we were just drifting apart and things were just coming up that led me to believe that we should just stop being friends and we haven't spoken to each other for more than 3 years and we had been BFFs for more than 15...yea...a long time. As I think back to our relationship, I outgrew Lisa. I was already in college and she was still in highschool due to poor decisions and I just didn't want to be in a childish relationship anymore. I was moving on and she wasn't. 

After my relationship with Lisa ended, JR and me were still cool. She was my cousin and we had to see each other almost every weekend since we're family and parties were always being thrown as well as reunions and other events. We spoke all the time and I confided in her thinking it was ok, since blood is thicker than water...how wrong I was...

A few months after my relationship with Lisa fell through, she began to hang out more with her. Lisa and me are neighbors...like we live 2 feet from each other and avoid each other at all cost but I began to see something weird when every time JR would come over, she would come upstairs with Lisa. I thought about it. How is it possible that Lisa and me live 2 feet from each other and we haven't seen each other in ages but JR comes every week and she sees her every time she comes over. I wasn't about to go and tell JR that she couldn't be friends with Lisa because I couldn't care less, I just don't like getting lied to. So I brought it up with JR and all she could say was, oh, its just a coincidence. I knew all of that was BULLSHIT so I just said fuck it, I don't need her or Lisa to make my life complete because I knew that JR was telling Lisa everything about what was going on between us and I knew she was going to fuck me over so I just said fuck it...

When JR moved to New Jersey, things got even worse. She began began hanging out with our older cousins who only cared about getting drunk all day and night. I haven't spoken to her for more than 2 years after the whole Lisa thing...the only time we spoke to each other was during our little cousin's birthday party. I had just cut my hair and I had bangs and she stood in front of me while I went and got food. 

JR: Hi Mari

Me: Hi JR

JR: Your bangs look nice on you

Me: Thank you

And I walked away and went back to my seat...thats it. She still comes over to Lisa's house to see her and knowing I live 2 feet away, she doesn't even come to say hi to my parents but I don't care. She could fuck Lisa for all I care, they could go and runaway and get married and I could care even less...I don't need unnecessary stress from the two most immature people on the face of this Earth...

But while I don't care what Lisa and JR do together, I always end up hearing the juiciest gossip that I have no idea how and who invents it. The latest bit I've heard is that JR has a black boyfriend and my father's family is probably the biggest bunch of inconspicuous racists on the planet. They say they don't mind black people but if one of us ends up dating anyone one on that side of color spectrum, they throw fits. So JR's dating this black guy and my uncle is like I want to meet him but if he steps foot into this house, I'll cut him which basically means that he doesn't even want to breathe the same air as JR's boyfriend and the gossip got even hotter! Apparently, JR rents hotel rooms for her boyfriend and herself to have sex in and her parents pay the bill...yes....how fucking crazy is that?! They pay the bill that JR rents to fuck her black boyfriend in. When our family heard, there was an uproar and the culprit who said had to apologize because supposedly it was false but EVERYONE knows that shit is true....great, huh? Her parents tried to cover it up but we already knew what a whore she is...which just makes me my whole day a whole lot better...


It is hot as Hades outside today...super humid and that just plays a massive number on my hair. I should've known that once Memorial Day came and went, it was going to get really hot and low and behold, it is. 

Yesterday was my little cousin Annie's birthday. She was turning 7. Since she's the only girl out of 4 boys, my sis and I decided that we were going throw her a little party and that's exactly what we did, what we didn't plan for was having soo many people there. My sis and me made her about 21 cupcakes and we decorated the party area and bought her a cute summer outfit with matching sunglasses, when we arrived the place was full of kids. Normally, I wouldn't have even bothered with it but yesterday, I was seriously in no mood to deal with prepubescent minors who's lives revolve a computer or the Wii. 

I wasn't in my aunt's house for 10 minutes when she came up to me and demanded why I didn't say hi to her sister who isn't my aunt (I don't even consider her my relative). I just looked at her and left the room. My not aunt is a conceited and arrogant person who has the 3 most annoying boys on the face of this Earth and all she's good for is grabbing her purse and going out shopping while my aunt stays with her 3 demon children plus her own 2 kids. Since she doesn't control them or set any type of rules, they run all over the place which drives me INSANE!! I can't sit for 2 seconds without one of those fucking kids coming over and bothering me and they apparently are deaf because as much as I complain and pretty much beg them to stop, they don't and if I dare to put a hand on them, she comes running over demanding that I never touch her children again which gets me soooo pissed! 

So I was helping my sis set up Annie's party and my not aunt has a son that's about 12 who swears up, down and around that he's the hottest shit this side of the Hudson River and of course, he isn't. He calls my sis and me nerds just because we speak proper English while all he knows is Spanglish. He mimics us and makes fun of us and calls us names but I of course ignore him since I don't really talk to idiots like himself. My sis on the other hand, she goes all out and calls him enough names to want to go home because she continues to harass him for as long as he's there so its good to have her there. 

So finally, its time for the cakes and we sang her 'Happy Birthday' and it was nice and then when everyone was taking cupcakes, my not aunt demanded to know why we made the cupcakes of vanilla cake with chocolate frosting. 

My not aunt: yuck! Chocolate. Why didn't you just make it vanilla? 

My sis: it ain't your birthday. If you don't want cake leave it for someone else. 

Me: haha

So she took a cupcake and scrapped the chocolate frosting off and my sis and me swore to never make cupcakes for my little cousin again. 

Later on, I was in the kitchen getting something to drink and my not aunt came in. For some reason, every time my family sees me or talks to me on the phone they ask me how's my boyfriend. They have no idea how pissed off that gets me for 2 reasons: 1) how is my love life any of their business and 2) if I was in a relationship, I wasn't going to tell them so they should just stop fucking asking! So I'm getting something to drink and she clears her throat. 

My not aunt: so, how's your boyfriend? 

Me: he's home ::while I roll my eyes:: 

My not aunt: omg! so you have a boyfriend? what's his name? 

Me: yeah and I'm not telling you. 

My not aunt: what? why? Its not like I'm going to tell anyone

Me: better be safe than sorry. 

My aunt: leave her alone, don't ask her about boys, she's too young. 

Me: Thank you and I am not too young, I just don't have time to deal with guys right now. Too much shit going on. 

My not aunt: you should be out with a boyfriend right now, at the park, making out. 

Me: eww and no I don't really fancy PDA. 

My not aunt: you are so boring

Me: I'm not boring, I'm just not easy like you. 

And I walked away. I don't mean to offend anyone who does enjoy PDA but I don't really like it especially when I'm on the subway and have to watch 13 and 14 year old kids devouring each other during rush hour...no thank you. 

After I got home later that afternoon, my mom began to make the biggest mess on the face of this Earth. We're going on vacation and since the airlines are making people pay for anything over 50 pounds in a piece of checked luggage, my mom is sending things ahead of time. Personally, I'm thankful because the last time we went, I had to carry a HUGE backpack full of underwear, my own purse, and a shopping bag full of crap that wasn't mine because she just needed to take it to my little cousin because of course she wasn't carrying it. So she was filling up 2 big blue barrels with pretty much EVERYTHING that doesn't fit in luggage and that made a mess. I stayed in my room, I really didn't need to see that mess plus it isn't like I help anyway. Its not that I'm lazy, I just don't really want to be involved in a trip that I don't even want to go on. It was 12 when my sis finally finished helping her clean up while I watched 'True Life' on MTV. 

This morning, I woke up with the mother of all migraines and its only on one side of my head which annoys me to no end so as I type this, I'm begging the Excedrin that I took a few minutes ago to kick in and stop the pain before I break my head in since it'll probably hurt less...bloody sure but less painful...